Things my Dad always said:
"Pears make you pretty" (so I ate a lot of pears)
"Eating/Doing --fill-in-the-blank-- grows hair on your chest" (whenever he didn't want me to eat or do something)
"Tastes like more" (when anything tasted excellent)
"It'll sure feel good when it stops hurting" (to make me laugh whenever I got a scrap or a bruise)
"Take one for each hand" (when trying to decide what cookie to choose)
"That's the good kind" (whenever he really liked something)
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Next time I'll tell you the story of "Falling Rock, " Dad's version.
2 comments:
My Dad's best saying is: my enthusiasm for [extremely unpleasant but unavoidable event] falls somewhere between my enthusiasm for root canal and my enthusiasm for snake bite.
At least root canals mean that you go home with good drugs, I guess...
My late father -- like yours, and most Dads, I expect -- left some colorful Dad-isms behind, too:
> About the winter weather: "It's colder'n a well-digger's ass in January."
> Outside the closed bathroom door (the six people in my family lived in a one-bath house): "Are you going to DIE in there, or what?"
> When I was really taking my time getting something done: "You're slower than molasses in January."
> When he wanted to irritate my mother, and she had made a casserole for supper: "My God! What happened in THAT bowl?"
I well remember one night when that irritated her so successfully that she dipped a spoon into the casserole and flipped it at him, catapult-style. The flying food went the length of the table and caught him squarely in the center of the forehead. It was an unlikely shot; thinking back on it, I believe she could have tried ten times to do the same thing, without coming close. The ensuing hilarity was general, and lengthy.
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